Twins bedtime – unexpected popularity

Hi. For a few days ago a friend suggested a bedtime routine for me, and I thought I should try it out. I’ve been having a hard time getting my twins to bed recently because of the heat and long, sunny days, and I thought I’d try something new. But I was pretty certain it wouldn’t work, so i filmed it.

Normally, I would put them to bed, sing a few songs while tickeling their backs and close the door behind me. That worked out great, and they usually felt asleep within 30 minutes. But that changed.

I posted the video on my facebook wall, and it went viral in a really short time. That was not my purpose, but I thought it was quite funny actually, and people kept sharing it. Suddenly it had over 100 000 views, and it kept spreading.

Comments appeared frequently, and I tried to keep up. And the comments became mean, hurtful and disrespectful, and this is why I’m writing this post. When you call me a bad mom, tell me I never should have kids and encourage me to hit my kids, I can’t just sit back and say nothing. I won’t.

 

I live in Norway, and if we hit our kids we lose them. Thank god for that! I live in a peaceful country with low crime, and I love it here. Many of the people commenting on my youtube video said that they are spanking/hitting their children. They also said that they were spanked in their childhood, and that it didn’t affect them. Well, is that really true? It make them hurt their own children, because they grew up that way themselves. It’s wrong. But go ahead, treat your children however you want, that’s not my concern.

What I want to achieve, is to tell you that I’m not a bad mom. I’d do anything for my children, I really would. I will tell you about my bedtime routine, since so many people are commenting negative stuff about it;

After they have taken a fairly long shower and brushed their teeth, I put them in their beds. They have always shared a room, the only exception was in the video – because I tried a new method, and it didn’t work out. And yes, they do have blinds in their windows, even though it doesn’t look like it in the youtube video. When the door is open, the wind blow the blinds away from the window, and let the sun into the room. When the door is closed, it’s fairly dark in there.

After we have spoken a few minutes about how their day was, I tickle their backs and sing for them. I’ve tried to read books for them, but they aren’t interested in listening to me reading, so I sing instead. I keep tickeling and singing until they are asleep, sometimes it’s 5 minutes and other times it’s an hour.

Leon normally wakes up after an hour or two, and I end up carrying him into my bed, to prevent him from waking up Nathaniel. I tickle and sing for a few minutes again, and Leon is once again asleep. Normally an hour later, Nathaniel wakes up and walks straight into my room. I tuck him in, and leave the room. I really don’t mind them sleeping in my bed, I think it’s comforting and really nice. I only wish they didn’t use 90% of the super king size bed, forcing me to sleep in the footend. But, I’m used to it by now.

When the weather gets normal and the sun sets earlier, I’ll go back to our normal routine wich I mentioned earlier in this post. But for now, this works for us. If you want to judge, be my guest. Now I’ve at least told my story.

257 thoughts on “Twins bedtime – unexpected popularity

  1. I loved your video! Very cute :) I cannot believe people were saying such hurtful things…i’m sorry for that :(
    I agree with you about the excuse “I was hit when I was young and there’s nothing wrong with me!”
    I don’t plan on smacking my boy and people just keep saying he will turned out spoilt and not respect me! I think he will respect me if I teach him respect and not fear me because I hit him.

    Anyway just wanted to say good on you! To have twins must be tough and I can imagine bedtime being just like it is in your video-hilarious yet exhausting :)
    Keep doing what you’re doing xoxo

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  2. If only there were more mum’s like you. Chin up people can be so mean. It’s not you it’s them. They are the ones with issues and should be justifying their parenting. Not you :)

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  3. I can not see what is wrong about what you did in the video.. It’s teaching them self independence and how to put them self to sleep. It takes a strong mum to do this as children will push the boundaries and that’s just natural. Taking the easy way out is not easier I learnt the hard way with my son now attending school and the long night struggles of getting him to sleep and to sleep in my bed. His over tired and grumpy in the mornings and this affects his learning come school time. Keep up the good hard work! There will be no need to switch back to any other style as if you get them early which I learnt with my second it doesn’t take them long to realise this is bed time and I need to go to sleep. Your actually do in your child a favour by teaching them to go to sleep at a reasonable time and by themselves!

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  4. I just want you to know that you are a great mum and your children are very cute and cheeky! I am glad you see the funny side of it. I hope you find a solution to your sleeping problem soon!

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  5. You sound like a wonderful mum and doing a great job with your twins. You will raise two very secure people who will pass on this loving goodness to others in their lives.

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  6. You are doing such a great job. Keep up the gentle parenting it will stand you in good stead. Also if you use a bit of liquid soap with a spray bottle of water. Spray onto window then use that to stick on tin/ aluminum foil to the window. It works as a fantastic temporary black out blind, plus reflects a lot of the heat keeping the room cooler. This is what we sometimes do as where we live is super hot. Enjoy your Twinnies!

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  7. Oh Lordy that was so funny you poor thing. My twins are 4 now so I’ve been there and this is what I remember having to do and keeping with it until they got use to the routine. Oh it was a good laugh the one in the room on the left…….he’s priceless looks like the mischief one. Good luck mum doing a great job pat yourself on the back every now and then.

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  8. oh! I cannot believe the things people say. Especially other mamas. This video was so cute it made me giggle. As a mama of 5 this feels like my life too. Huge applause and love to you for your honesty and class xx

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  9. I watched the video and thought you did a fantastic job, it must have been exhausting but you persisted and eventually won. I’m sure if you kept it up the time would get shorter and shorter. Well done for defending yourself against the haters. Unfortunately the internet is full of people with too much time on their hands who feel the need to judge others’ parenting.

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  10. What you done is not bad.infact many Australian childhood nurses tell you to keep putting them back in bed and they will eventually learn its sleep time and stay there..you are NOT a bad mum you are a very very patient mum..good work.😄😀

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  11. Omgosh you doing an amazing job. You have no need to justify youself and clown with half a brain can see what your doing and doing it very well you kept your cool your consistent theres no aggression or violence and your right its really funny to watch lol. People need to stop looking for excuses to fight on facebook. In my opinion job well done parenting is all trial and error the fact that you even try is way more than most.Be proud.

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  12. For en utrolig tolmodig mamma guttene dine har! Jeg har bare en gutt (1,5 år) og har slitt på samme måte som deg med leggingen i sommervarmen. Synes du gjør en fantastisk jobb, og guttene dine er heldige som har en mamma som deg! Stå på :-)

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  13. Oh dear, this gave me a giggle. Poor you. I couldn’t imagine trying to get two strong willed little ones to sleep. They just kept on getting up and you were so calm! Good on you for trying something new. It’s the only way we know if its going to work!

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  14. Hi, from the looks of the video you are a fantastic mummy to your little boys. How old are they? I have a son who is almost 18 months. The patience and love that you show them proves what an amazing mum you are.

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  15. Ohh mumma!! I feel half your pain- only half because I don’t have twins!!
    I hadn’t watched your video until I saw a news report about you being harnessed and abused by nasty trolls!! (They didn’t approve)
    I believe in gentle parenting and watched your video and had a little giggle at first (your boys are super cute) then started to feel exhausted, then started to feel impressed at how you were keeping your cool!! So many people would’ve smacked by the half way point in your video!!
    Then on top of my personal opinion to come read this post :)
    I just want to give you a high 5, sit down and have a cuppa with you and reflect, were good mums :)
    Well done mumma!! You’re doing a fab job- in my opinion, which really isn’t much :)

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  16. Great job!!! I never disciplined my children with violence, people used to tell me they would be spoilt blah blah blah…… Well they are now respectful, caring adults. So keep up the great work, and remember no one knows your children like you do.

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  17. Awesome :-) We only just moved to Sweden and the younger one of my two girls really struggled with the heat and light (and yes, we too have blinds). I am doing pretty much what you are doing in the video. At a certain point, they will understand and stay in bed. They are only little once!! Much love, Deborah

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  18. Wow, that was funny I couldn’t help but laugh, your babies looked like they were testing you. You have a lot of patients, well done. 😃

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  19. The video made me laugh and grimace at the same time. As the mum of 16 month old twins i see what i have to look forward to but also struck a chord as this i what its like with twins. Your doing an amazing job

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  20. I think you are incredibly patient x I have four children and with every one I have always lay with them til they go to sleep, even with their day naps! if I were you I would put them in a double bed together and lie in the middle til they go sleep x😃

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  21. I surely don’t know how anyone, outside of their own misery of course could say you are a bad mom. Keep doing what you feel is the right thing bless you and have fun they grow up so quickly!

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  22. Thank you! I think you are setting a great example for other moms on how to handle an overwhelming situation. I am very sorry that you are getting such nasty comments from other moms and parents.

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  23. Fantastisk morsom filmsnutt – kjenner meg igjen (har 3 små barn selv). Du er ingen dårlig mamma! Våre barn ender også opp i senga vår…men det er kos og de sover så godt. Keep up the good work. Tenk at noen kan få seg til å si at du er en dårlig mamma av en slik morsom film, jeg lo og lo. Herlig.

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  24. There’s nothing wrong with your parenting style. Forget what other people say, your taking care of your kids your way, they are happy and healthy.

    I use the same method with my 2 year, if she’s not a sleep after a few stories and me lying with her for a bit and it works, she eventually goes to sleep on her own.

    Sure this method can take a long time but it teaches the child to self sooth and to go to sleep on there own. This is how we all come to go to sleep so why not encourage it?

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  25. I think you are doing a really great job and lots of other parents will be amazed by your patience!

    Our three kids sleep in a queensize double bed and I can really recommend that:

    You can bring them back to their bed during the night and lay down with them. If you’re really tired you can just fall asleep yourself. And you always have enough space in your or their bed to sleep – no matter where your boys sleep. So if you have enough space I can really recommend that!

    Maybe an extendable bed would fit?
    So you can just pull one half of the trundle bed back in the morning and have space during the day?

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  26. I think you are wonderful and strong for standing up for yourself and your children. Although I hate that you had to do so!!!! Your children are beautiful!!!

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  27. You’re doing a great job! I’ve been through the exact same thing with my daughter, it went on night after night, I lost count after putting her back to her bed over 40 times, and that was just one child not twins! It’s good to have a sense of humour about the challenging times of parenting, keeps you from going crazy! :)

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  28. Just wanted to be another voice in the crowd to express appreciation for this blog post and for sharing the video in the first place. You are clearly a wonderful mother with adorable little ones and I’m so sorry that this has received any negativity.

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  29. People are so hurtful for no reason. You’re a good mom and your video shows that. Thank you for sharing. Made me laugh thinking of my own children and how crazy bedtime routine can be sometimes.

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  30. I love your video. I have 3 kids under the age of 3 and know how exhausting bedtime is. I am also a twin and don’t mind at all that u separate ur twins. I wish my mom would have seperated us n a way, I might have been more independent. So cute thanks for sharing.

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  31. Jeg syns det ser ut som at du gjør en kjempe jobb! Jeg er selv tvilling og har to yngre brødre som er tvillinger så jeg vet hvordan det er å legge tvillinger, er det en som ikke vil legge seg så kan du banne på at den andre heller ikke vil! :p du har en fantastisk tolmodighet som jeg ikke tror enhver forelder har, så hatten av til deg for det :) Min mor var også veldig ung da hun fikk meg og min søster, da vi var hos vår far i helgene pleide han å sitte på rommet vårt å se på oss og hvis vi åpnet øynene etter at vi hadde lagt oss fikk vi beskjed om å lukke de igjen, sånn satt han helt til vi hadde sovnet, noe som ikke tok så lang tid når vi måtte ha øynene igjen. Så det er så mange forskjellige måter å gjøre det på, en fremmed kan ikke komme å si at din måte er feil.

    All ros til deg som ikke blir helt gal av å ha tvillinger :p

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  32. Dina barn verkar ha det hur bra som helst! Jag skrattade igenkännande åt din video och är imponerad av ditt tålamod! Jag har själv en ettåring som är tålamodsprövande ibland och kan bara applådera dig so klarar av 2 st! 😊

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  33. Thumbs up for your patience, it’s funny how twins can take your time, and it only gets worse, big smile you will get some amazing experiences, good luck

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  34. Pingback: VIDEO: Mother records how long it takes to put toddler’s to bed | PHL17.com

  35. Pingback: Putting Boys to Bed : Building Boys

  36. I think you’re doing a great job and I’m shocked that people would suggest spanking – if anything that would make bedtime a traumatic experience when it should be the exact opposite. I was spanked as a child and I do not believe it’s a good way to raise children. I still remember how I felt, how I trusted my parents just a tiny bit less after every spank.

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  37. now that’s called patience! :D it’s really funny to watch, but with only one kid (for two more weeks) I know how hard it can be, especially in the light months (I live in Iceland). I don’t think you did anything wrong either, so just ignore the mean comments (haters are always there, no matter what). keep up with good parenting, and may the force be with you, haha :) [your kids are really cute :)]

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  38. I loved your video, you have great patience unlike myself 😂. Parenting is hard enough one at a time, let alone 2, keep on doing it your way.

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  39. What a patient mum you are! Well done. That was very funny, but only because I can relate – a little. You must be exhausted. Keep up the good work.

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  40. This happens to so many moms-we judge each other harshly without knowing one another. We should support each other, not knock each other down. You’re video was so funny because it reminds me of my struggles to put my 2 year old to bed. Thanks for sharing!

    Like

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